I’ve been home nearly 1 ½ weeks now, and I haven’t been able to bring myself to sit down and really write of my journey. I’m a writer; writing is what I love and part of what I do for a living. But it is a daunting task sitting down to put words to all the things that have made my heart want to explode. It’s very difficult to convey to someone who wasn’t there what needs to be conveyed. To describe what I saw, where I went, whom I met in such detail that would make the reader feel as if they too had experienced it…very few writers can do this well. And trying to filter through who actually really cares—this too often proves to be discouraging. Life at home always carries on as usual, even when others are helping to rewrite someone else’s story.
So after much thinking, rethinking and processing, I realized that the lives I helped to rewrite do deserve to have their stories told…even if I only give highlights of the journey. To quote one of my favourite songwriters, Brooke Fraser: “Now that I have held you in my own arms, I cannot let go of who you are… I am responsible…”
I have an ample amount of things to write, but for now I have compiled summaries and a few thoughts. If you don’t read it, I won’t be offended. If you only skim through it and catch the headlines, that’s fine as well. Despite the chances that no one reads it, I am still responsible to tell the story of these beautiful people. Our lives are so much bigger than ourselves, and I hope that someone may find it encouraging, refreshing and inspiring to hear stories outside their own.
Regardless of what you just skim, how much you take in or what you find encouraging, the disclaimer is that this is about Jesus. 2 Corinthians 5:14 says “For Christ’s love compels us…” It is only HIS love and what He has done for me that gives me the strength, courage and desire to work for an organization like Watoto, much less go and do the things that I’ve done in Uganda. What happened day to day has so little to do with me, and so hugely to do with the Goodness and Grace of God.
1. Tour of Dubai (stopover before Africa). I’ll be honest…I loath Dubai. When we first arrived I was completely in awe of the grandeur of the architecture—until I found out the cost of building some of the hotels and high rises there. The cost of one night in one of Dubai’s biggest hotels could literally build a single home for Watoto’s parentless children in Uganda. The cost to build some of the attractions in Dubai could probably build an entire village (or two). The pride and greed of humanity is blatantly apparent in Dubai, and definitely more sobering than just getting on a plane and turning up in Africa.
2. Arrival in Uganda. We flew into Entebbe and drove 45 minutes to Kampala. Kampala is the capitol city, so it doesn’t look very “African” just yet. We stayed in a home called “Adonai 5 Guesthouse.” Adonai felt like a mansion! None of us were very sure how to feel about this large home in the middle of Africa…but we were humbled by how well Watoto took care of us. 13 ladies in total on the team, such a GREAT group of ladies!
3. Living Hope, Kampala. Words cannot describe. The women were beautiful--all HIV positive. Most of them have lost their husbands, and all of them have 4 or more children, so they’re part of the Living Hope program because they are unable to take care of themselves. Watoto’s Living Hope program seeks to restore dignity to vulnerable women through many programs such as trauma counselling, help with HIV anti-viral medication, and other things such as sewing skills and spiritual discipleship. We started off teaching them basic sewing and cross-stitch skills so that they can sell things in the local markets for money. At the end of the week, we did a day of pampering (facials, feet and back massages). There were two ladies who stood out for me in particular: Doreen & Jane.
Doreen’s Story: Doreen came in to the Living Hope centre a day later than the other ladies. We were all a little unsure of whether she was a woman or a man at first. Doreen did not smile, she smelled bad, and because she didn’t speak English or the Kampala dialect none of us could even communicate with her. It was difficult to work with her and we were unsure of if she’d turn up again…but she did turn up, day after day! By the end of the week, Doreen’s hard work paid off and she was able to cross-stitch something on her own. The best part was that we saw her smile…by Friday, she was dressing differently, she smelled clean, and she was smiling. I don’t know Doreen’s history, but she’s obviously not had the easiest life. It was beautiful to see her transform in only a few days.
Jane’s Story: Jane is very sick. She quite honestly has the smallest frame that I have ever seen. Jane’s HIV case is advanced, and we didn’t find out until the end of the week just how sick she was. She had been severely abused in the past and had 5 children with no husband. On Friday Jane arrived late…we were told that she had been at the hospital since the night before. Her kidneys were shutting down, and she was in a lot of pain. But Jane wanted to be with us so bad, she literally had someone carry her to the centre! Later that day when we were massaging her back, we realized that we could be the last people who would touch Jane in a loving way.
4. Preaching to the Living Hope Ladies. I believe that speaking/preaching is a gift that I have and unfortunately have not been able to use very much over the past few years. I was asked one of my first days in Kampala to speak to the Living Hope ladies. So I did….then I was asked again the next day! I believe it was the last day that I was speaking, I realized (while one of the staff was translating what I had just said) that I was at that very moment living a dream. At that very moment, I was not thinking of my selfish desires or myself. I wasn’t concerned with how I looked, what anyone thought of me or what task I had to complete. I was standing raw and vulnerable before 50 women from the third-world, bringing the message of God’s love and pointing them to Jesus. One lady even cried and I was told later she became a born again Christian. More than anything else so far in the trip, this was certainly a highlight because I was alive and living wide awake…
5. Safari. We spent about 5-6 hours in a jeep, tromping across the Ugandan savannah searching for animals that I have only ever seen in a zoo! We saw elephants, giraffes, antelopes, spring-boks, baboons, hippos, lions, water buffalo, and leopards. Leopards, which had not been seen in many weeks! My boss, who has been to Africa 26 times in his life, had NEVER seen a leopard in the wild. We prayed so hard to see them, and God answered….it was amazing! Even more amazing though was sunset over the Nile River….nothing like it!
6. Gulu. Gulu is in the Northern part of Uganda, near the Sudanese border. For many years, Gulu has been war torn. Starting in 1987, a group called the “Lord’s Resistance Army” (LRA) wanted to take over Uganda, so they formed their own army, made of children. They began to abduct children as young as 4 years old and forced them to be soldiers. These children were made to do unspeakable acts of torture, murder, and other very animalistic traits just to survive. In the 90’s, young women, some as young as 6 years old, were also abducted and forced to become wives or sex slaves to these young soldiers. After many years of trauma, abuse and prayers, some of these child soldiers and wives have been released (or ran away) and are currently being rehabilitated through Watoto in Gulu.
The role of my team in Gulu was to train some of the Church volunteers to do the pampering (face, feet, nails and back massage) and then practically reach out to the Living Hope women in Gulu by working with the volunteers in spending time pampering the Living Hope ladies and making them feel beautiful. Like the Living Hope ladies in Kampala, all of these ladies are HIV positive and have several children but no husband to care for them. The difference is that most of these ladies have also been severely abused….several were mutilated and very few of them made eye contact. To spend time pampering a woman who has only ever been touched in an abusive way has the power and potential to change her life. It also has the power to change our lives too, if we let it.
Grace’s Story. Grace was the first Living Hope lady in Gulu that I was going to massage. I was already nervous because I had no idea how to control what was happening in my heart. From the moment we arrived in Gulu, I felt so flustered internally…in Kampala for example, the children on the streets (even the beggars) would come alive and climb over each other to smile at us and give us a wave. But in Gulu (where for a child, the terror of being abducted only ended last year) it appeared that anyone who is not from your neighbourhood is not to be trusted right away. The difference at first was almost surreal. Many children in Gulu seem to stare at you with mistrust rather than excitement and a wave. A smile seems nearly impossible to get from them (with the exception of the children from the local churches). Having seen a few documentaries, I knew that many of these houses had once lost a child or two. The hospital across the street from our accommodation is the same building that the night commuter children used to hide in for fear of being abducted. Even the Living Hope quarters itself was a government building given to Watoto, which was once a camp for the children who were hiding from the LRA. So when Grace came out in her robes for her massage, I had to swallow my tears at the sight of her mutilated body. Grace had been one of the wives of one of the generals of the LRA. She was in her 20’s, HIV positive, had 6 children and had escaped from the LRA the year before. Her back was covered with vertical scar tissue where she had been stabbed and torn open, and over these scars were horizontal razor cuts. All up and down her arms were cigarette burn marks, and her legs were covered with dark spots were chunks had literally been removed by knives. Part of her ears were missing, and her bottom lip had been split (a number of times it seemed). She had no open wounds so I was safe…in fact, none of her scars were very recent at all. Grace had a past.
I will never forget feeling paralysed. The rest of my teammates had already started massaging their ladies. The worship music was soft, the candles and incense lit and it was the perfect environment for a good 15-minute back massage. But I couldn’t move. I literally couldn’t move….
It’s funny how all in a matter of a few brief seconds, so many things can go through your mind. I thought of Jesus, and how He had some of these similar scars…He had them so that women like myself and Grace (ironic name hey?) could have hope and live in relationship with Him.
I thought of the Watoto Children’s Choir who I work so hard to promote in Australia. I thank GOD that they don’t ever have to go through what Grace has been through.
I thought of the atmosphere….how only two years ago this same building--now filled with worship music, candles and women who are full of hope--was then filled with parentless children literally hiding for their lives. It was full of feces, riddled with disease, terror and hopelessness. To look at it now was almost more than my emotions could bare.
It wasn’t until I made eye contact with another team member a few seconds later that I realized how incredibly HONOURED I was to be at that very place, at that very moment, massaging beautiful Grace. I held back the tears and went to loving on her….at the end of 15 minutes I was able to pray for her, and she in turn asked to pray for ME. I was so humbled! Compared to her, I am a fat, wealthy American living the dream in Australia with my good health and great home, yet she wanted to pray for me. She prayed (in broken English) for my future children, that they would know Jesus and be successful. She prayed that I would continue to walk with God and that my marriage would be healthy and fruitful. Grace then came back to me about an hour later and asked me to write down just my first name in her Bible, so that she could continue to pray for me. I was changed…and hopefully so was she.
Mary’s Story (not her real name). “Mary” was another lady that I met at Living Hope. Many of you reading this have seen “Mary” at one time or another, on some form of media or promo material. Mary was discovered several years ago by an organization that is not linked to Watoto. Mary was abducted at a young age by the LRA and forced to do the most horrendous things. Her face has been mutilated and disfigured due to her “disobedience” as a wife. She has several children, she has HIV, is around 20 years old, and some of her relatives and friends are part of Watoto’s Living Hope program. Mary, however, is not part of the program.
I sat with Mary for about 30 minutes one day. She had actually came to volunteer her time putting together food baskets at Living Hope to give to those women “less fortunate” than her (can you believe it). She doesn’t speak English very well, so the majority of our time was spent just playing together with her two-year old daughter and hugging each other. At the end of the 30 minutes, our team was beginning the pampering session with the Living Hope ladies. Mary suddenly had this terribly sad look on her face, and prepared her little girl to leave. Instead of joining the queue for a facial or foot massage, Mary and her daughter were leaving Living Hope. My heart sank a little because I wasn’t sure if I had done something to offend Mary. Later, however, I was told by the Living Hope Coordinator in Gulu more of Mary’s story.
When Mary was discovered by this other group, they made her some promises and had her sign a contract saying she would be a faithful member of their organization and that they alone would support her. Because of her appearance and history, Mary is considered by any media group as “prime promo material.” Becoming part of a program such as Watoto’s Living Hope program means that Mary would be shared with the other organization, which breaks the contract that she signed. So in essence, Mary cannot benefit from any of Living Hope’s initiatives (even being pampered) because Watoto was told by the other organization that she is under their care. Watoto definitely does honour the contract that she has with this group. Mary is well fed by the other organization, and they also help care for her children and say they are raising money for her; sadly they do not offer her the full trauma rehabilitation, medical attention or spiritual guidance that Living Hope offers. Mary therefore volunteers her time helping with Living Hope food distributions for other ladies who need help. Anything that she can do to be around Living Hope makes her happy, especially since many of her friends are part of the program.
The other organization is not a Christian based organization, and we are not sure if Mary is a believer or not. The beautiful thing is that Mary is drawn to Living Hope because she finds the love of Christ there. And despite her personal circumstances, she knows that she can make a difference in the life of others who have her same wounds.
For obvious reasons I cannot give more details than this…in fact, it is actually quite difficult to write much more than this because of how emotional I get about it all. Watoto has been incredibly wise with how they have handled the whole situation, and as painful as it is to see someone not get the full benefits they deserve, they have honoured Mary's agreement with the other group. Pray with me that no matter what, Mary’s life would be restored and that she would know true redemption.
7. The Children’s Villages: Suubi, Bbira & Labora. Watoto does not want to build institutionalized orphanages for Uganda’s parentless children. Their heart is to build homes. There are therefore three villages, two outside Kampala and one in Gulu. Each home has several “clusters” of houses that have been paid for and built by global teams from across the planet. Each cluster has 8-9 homes, and in each home there are eight orphaned children and one house-mother to care for them. Usually the house-mother has been abandoned by her own husband and may/may not be HIV positive. All house-mothers are Christians, and all are given eight children to care for. Between the three villages, Watoto is looking after about 2,000 of Uganda’s orphans. If you’ve seen the Watoto Children’s choir, then you’ve seen a few of thsee 2,000 children who have been given a new future!
I loved all three villages, but Suubi was my absolute favourite! We had lunch in one of the homes with the children and a mother, and then were able to walk around and explore the village. It was amazing for me to be at the home of many of the children from the choir! The highlight for me was going to Ismail’s house. Ismail is one of the precious kids from this year’s choir in Australia whom Carston and I became very close to while the choir was in Brisbane. I knew what number his house was because I promised to go and visit his mother, so I was thrilled to make my way over to see his family. After a lovely chat and beautiful time with his mother, she asked if they could pray for me…soon the whole cluster (8 houses) had come into her little home and they ALL prayed over me!!!! The children were so happy and full of joy, and I figured at that moment that Suubi must be the happiest place on earth!!!! ☺
Of course we had many other adventures, challenges and special moments (like the Watoto Babies’ Home, which rescues abandoned babies from places like rubbish dumps, etc.), but I figured this was more than enough for most of you to read (unless you want more…just ask)!
More than ever, my heart is moved for missions, for Watoto and for Uganda. Seeing the work of Watoto with my own eyes was almost more than I could bare…yet I feel so honoured and privileged to work for such an amazing organization.
I will never be the same….
Pray for Carston and I as we are tentatively planning on returning, hopefully next year on a building team. The hardest part of the trip was not being able to experience it with my husband. I can’t wait for him to see what I have seen….
To end, I’d like to direct you to a short video that a friend of mine showed me. http://www.tangle.com/view_video?viewkey=38974b6dd52e94ba5bb2
The lyrics can tell the story better than I ever could….
Love
Mandy
